Book 6: Last Sacrifice

ʺShe was right about something else too,ʺ Dimitri said after a long pause. My back was to him, but there was a strange quality to
his voice that made me turn around.
ʺWhatʹs that?ʺ I asked.
ʺThat I do still love you.ʺ
With that one sentence, everything in the universe changed.
Time slowed to one heartbeat. The world became his eyes, his voice. This wasnʹt happening. It wasnʹt real. None of it could be real.
It felt like a spirit dream. I resisted the urge to close my eyes and see if Iʹd wake up moments later. No. No matter how unbelievable it
all seemed, this was no dream. This was real. This was life. This was flesh and blood.
ʺSince . . . since when?ʺ I finally managed to ask.
ʺSince . . . forever.ʺ His tone implied the answer was obvious. ʺI denied it when I was restored. I had no room for anything in my
heart except guilt. I especially felt guilty about you—what Iʹd done—and I pushed you away. I put up a wall to keep you safe. It worked
for a while—until my heart finally started accepting other emotions. And it all came back. Everything I felt for you. It had never left; it was
just hidden from me until I was ready. And again . . . that alley was the turning point. I looked at you . . . saw your goodness, your hope,
and your faith. Those are what make you beautiful. So, so beautiful.ʺ
ʺSo it wasnʹt my hair,ʺ I said, unsure how I was even capable of making a joke at a time like this.
ʺNo,ʺ he said gently. ʺYour hair was beautiful too. All of you. You were amazing when we first met, and somehow, inexplicably, youʹve
come even farther. Youʹve always been pure, raw energy, and now you control it. Youʹre the most amazing woman Iʹve ever met, and Iʹm
glad to have had that love for you in my life. I regret losing it.ʺ He grew pensive. ʺI would give anything—anything—in the world to go
back and change history. To run into your arms after Lissa brought me back. To have a life with you. Itʹs too late, of course, but Iʹve
accepted it.ʺ
ʺWhy . . . why is it too late?ʺ
Dimitriʹs eyes grew sad. ʺBecause of Adrian. Because youʹve moved on. No, listen,ʺ he said, cutting off my protests. ʺYou were right
to do that after how I treated you. And more than anything else, I want you to be happy once we clear your name and get Jill
recognized. You said yourself that Adrian makes you happy. You said you love him.ʺ
ʺBut . . . you just said you love me. That you want to be with me.ʺ My words seemed clumsy, unworthy of his eloquence.
ʺAnd I told you: Iʹm not going to pursue another manʹs girlfriend. You want to talk honor? There it is in its purest form.ʺ
I walked toward him, each step ramping up the tension around us. Dimitri kept saying the alley was his turning point. For me? It was
now. I stood on the precipice of something that would change my life. For the last week, Iʹd done a very good job of detaching myself
from anything romantic with Dimitri. And yet . . . had I? What was love, really? Flowers, chocolate, and poetry? Or was it something
else? Was it being able to finish someoneʹs jokes? Was it having absolute faith that someone was there at your back? Was it knowing
someone so well that they instantly understood why you did the things you did—and shared those same beliefs?
All week, Iʹd claimed my love for Dimitri was fading. In reality, it had been growing more and more. I hadnʹt even realized it was
happening. I had been re-establishing our old rapport, strengthening the connection. Reaffirming that of all the people in the world
—even Lissa—Dimitri was the only one who truly got me.